How to stop depression

Last few years has been rough for me. Plenty of ups and downs, mainly downs and many really bad & terrible decisions and self inflicted pain.

I decided to write this piece to give me something to read when I'm feeling down and also give other people who are going through the same thing some lessons that might be useful to them, based on my experience. Anyways I did decide to do something about it though and I tried out a lot of different things. In this blog I will share some of the things that I tried and what I learned from them. Note, this is personal experience so it might not work for everyone.

1. I tried counselling/therapy. Basically just sit for like one hour per week and talk about my problems with a "professional". You know, when I was doing these sessions, after I actually felt really good. She said some things that made sense. I did this like two years ago and from what I can remember, the session was just me talking about my day, problems and she was just listening and answering in a very logical & rationale way. But it got repetitive. Sessions would go like this: 1) I have X problem. 2) She would say solve problem X by doing Y, its kinda obvious dude 3) I would say, but I don't want to do Y and then make up some retarded reason about why I don't want to do Y.

This would just repeat for like 45 minutes and then we would just say our goodbyes. Then when I got out of those sessions, I would be like "damn I really should do Y", but then never actually do it. I think the reason it felt good afterwards is because its kind of like a "talk show?" Its really just ALL ABOUT ME, WHATS MY PROBLEM, WHATS GOING ON IN MY LIFE. It really just feeds the ego. I think that thinking about yourself is a really bad habit to go down at least not for an extended period of time. You have to devote your life to something bigger than yourself and other people.

2. I tried cigarettes and alcohol. This didn't really work either. It would work for like a couple hours at best, but then you'd just feel like shit afterwards. So again, waste of time. Plus there's this rationale to not taking drugs & alcohol that I have really liked. It goes like this. If you take drugs or alcohol and you like it, you get addicted and you waste a lot of time and money on it and it ruins your health. If you take drugs and alcohol and you don't like it, well then you've just wasted your time doing something that you don't like. It's a lose-lose game. I don't want to play a game where I can't win.

3. Making FRIENDS! This works. Again it goes back to that life in service of other people thing. Serving other people is a really good way to distract yourself from your own problems. I'd like to be more purposeful about this though and start making friends in a more pragmatic and strategic way. You really have to put in the effort to make friends (especially as an adult).

4. Work like hell. I spent about 6 months developing an app just by myself. I would sit everyday in the school library and code until like midnight and then go home. The app went nowhere and got less than 100 users, but I felt FUCKING AMAZING. It was painful though, the pain of being a beginner, feeling like an idiot and struggling through it , but the pain of progress is always better than the pain of drowning in your own misery. When you work hard, this is the trade you are making. Always make this trade. When you can choose to drown in your misery or work hard, struggle, and make progress, always choose the latter.

5. Exercise. I started running and it feels really good. Not whilst you're running, but after. Running releases chemicals in the brain that make you feel good, including endorphins, endocannabinoids, and serotonin. Its LITERALLY SCIENCE!

6. Love. You should always be talking to someone you like or love. Not always, but you know I would say at least weekly or monthly. This helps a lot, because you try to better yourself for them. You know you want to impress them, etc.

7. God. I don't believe in God, but I think you have to believe in SOMETHING. Destiny, fate, science, gut anything, just believe in something. Like I believe I'm going to become a billionaire. Obviously its fucking delusional, but I believe it. And it's fun to work towards that goal. It's fun to build B2B SaaS that gives executives insights into critical business functions. Totally. Just believe in something.

Overall, I would say if there's any one I would choose. It's the WORK LIKE HELL one. I really believe This is the only way to really get out of depression. You have to work hard and make progress. My strategy is to work so hard, you just don't have time to be depressed. Preferably the thing you are working should excite you to our core.

In my case, work will set you free.